Wednesday, October 31, 2018

::festivals, whoppie pies, italy ears, pony, pretzels::

She looks slightly insane in this picture but I had to use it anyway.  This is Lily's first day at her first job!  She worked at a local pumpkin patch helping to run the kids area.  She loved and did a great job.  

One of my friends commissioned me to make them some Italy ears for their upcoming Epcot trip.  It ended up being crazy fun.  I loved how they turned out.  They are a one time only deal though because I had to make the green, white, and red fabric.  

We spent some quality time at the library over October break.  I just love our community library.  It is amazing and so kid friendly.  

Quinn makes Max play Battleship with him while I make my lists.  Max finds it so boring he moves his battle ship to the locations Quinn says just to make it end faster.  Quinn has no idea.  I let it go because it makes us all happy.  

We went to a local festival and all Quinn wanted to do was go on pony rides.  He is the cutest kid alive.  

I have decided I want to learn to bake.  Lily has been very happy to taste test my creations.  Here are some Orea whoopie pies.  

Emma and I made homemade pretzels and they kind taste like magic.  
Side note:  I have lost almost 50 pounds over the last year.  I don't eat these things.  I take a bite for two and the kids inhale the rest.   

The first time we made them Emma had the watch the oven like on Great British Bake Off.  We needed constant eye contact to get a good bake.  

::my gay daughter::

In January 2017 we had been moved in to our new town for a few months and were living in our rental house.  I was driving alone with Lily in the car and and I asked her if she has her eye on any of the boys in her new school.  She said a quick - no.  I was getting a little annoyed with that kind of attitude, what in the world was she expecting from men?   Absolute perfection physically?  WHAT!?  I had talked myself into that she was just too critical of boys.  I started chewing her out about being less harsh and more open minded to seeing the good in peoples hearts.  I said, "What exactly are you looking for in a boy?"  She takes this deep breath and says, "I'm just not into boys."  Now - I had read an article one time written by a gay woman that said when she told her grandmother she wasn't into boys her grandmother immediately asked her if she was seeing any girls, without missing a beat.   So I took a two count and and said, "Well, are there any girls you like in your class?"  And she went right off about some 8th grade girl she had the hots for.

Coming out to your parents is a life event and I didn't want to screw it up.   I was terrified that I would say the wrong thing and alienate her for life.  Pretty much how I feel during ever major parenting moment.  I went home and processed, and even in retrospect I feel like I got it right.  I was a little surprised, not exactly stunned, but I had to take a minute to process.  No big fancy wedding with a handsome groom that reminded me of her father at that age.  Then I thought, who gives a shit about her future husband?  Not her.  Only me.  I took about two days to mourn the death of what I had in mind for the future of Lily's love life.  Not that what I was hoping for really matters anyway, because it's all about her no matter what.  She needs to be her regardless of what I have in mind for her.   I'm sure as a parent this isn't the first or last time that I have to readjust my thoughts about what my children's future holds.  I needed a minute to think about it.  I needed to bring it up to her dad and work it out with him.  I had to say it outloud a few times.  I had to bring it up a few more times and figure out exactly how she felt about things.  Once I understood her certainty, I was onboard.

A big deal is that I am a mama bear.  You mess with my cubs and I will kill you.  No joke and no warning.  You make my precious daughter, that I have dreamed of having since I was old enough to realize that babies came from women, feel a bit lesser for being gay instead of straight and I will rearrange your life.  Not only is it "OK" that she is gay, it is more than OK.   It is exactly how she was designed to be.  So you mess with her and I bring the heat.

So now what?  This is a much improved world to be an openly gay teenager.  No one in her schools seems to care.  She has her little buddies and she is living her best life.  There are going to barriers for her, but she has her whole family behind her and we will protect and support her.  Onward and upward.      

Tuesday, October 9, 2018

::disney September 2018::

I have so been looking forward to this trip.  I give it my all at work and I sure try not to hold back at home.  Our Disney trips are often, I get it.  How can they afford to do this?  Well, we are lucky.  We have no hotel fees.  My parents join the vacation club in 1997, I'll post in more detail on that another day.  We also try to be modest in most other aspects of our life to pay for our Disney obsession.  We don't drive fancy cars, I'm crazy cheap (buy mostly used) with all of my clothing, etc.  We cut lots of corners in most of our life because we have learned that a huge part of our mental health happiness is Disney time.  This particular trip was unique.  I was hired to come give a speech in Disney and Josh and Quinn came along as my entourage.  We didn't bring the whole crew because last time we pulled them out of school their grades did not recovery.  Lucky Quinn, got to be the only child.   

A tradition  on the airport tram.  

We had one night at freshly renovated Coranado Springs as part of my gig.  It was really nice.  I was impressed.  Nice sized room, and Quinn loved the bathroom.  

Disney magic was everywhere.  

We got there early the first day and headed straight to Animal Kingdom.   This kid took his chances to chill whenever he could.  

Quinn was shy and freaked out when he got asked to be in a little parade at the Pandora gift shop.  But he did it.  

We where exhausted after getting 20K steps at AK.  Quinny and I had to sit and chill while waiting for the bus.  

The next morning it was time for my speech.  My topic was "Making Emotional Connections with Opioid Addicts".  It was awesome, but a little intimidating.  I didn't speak till 10:15 but of course I arrive two hours early to make sure I knew how to use all the IT stuff and go over it all in my head.  

Right before the peeps started rolling in I was ready to go.  And maybe puke.  

I got this dress and shoes just for this event.  I wanted to feel confident.  It helps that I have lost 50 pounds over the last 6 months.  Josh took this picture to send to my weight loss doctor.  No meds and no surgery, just good advice and lots of accountability.  I will post more on this at some point in the future.    

While I was at my meeting I got this picture from the amazing nurse Kathy that helps me in the office.  I got nominated for a nursing excellence award at work.  For the record - I get that I am on a high note at work right now.  Things are going really well.  I adore what I do and I am so excited to get to do what I love at the level I want to do it.  This award nomination was a cherry on top.  

After my speech was over we checked out of our hotel and checked in to Saratoga Springs.  I got changed into my Mary Poppins dress and ears and we went to Disney Springs to have a celebration lunch.  

I had three beverages, my favorite way to be.  

Then I talked the boys into letting me try on dresses at the Dress Shop.  I limit it to three try on dresses, you can only push Quinny so far.  I ended up buying the Small World dress, they have changed the style of it but are still using the same fabric.  Love it.  

We had to go to Goofy's Candy Co.  I love it here.  It took Quinn forever to even decide what he wanted.  

I wanted everything, but please remember I just lost 50 pounds.  I held off.  

Quinny ended up with a slushy.  God bless the lady at the counter.  She let him try 6 different flavors.  Once he finally picked she told him to hold on and she answered the phone.  It was Goofy on the phone and he said that Quinn needed this slushy for free.  Quinn was pumped to get some Disney Magic.  I thought it was so sweet.  

It took Quinn some time but he talked me into getting Buzz Lightyear.  
He had to tuck him in bed that night.  

The next day I went to some meetings half day and then we headed off to Magic Kingdom.  
In my new dress.    

Quinn made me ride the Magic Carpets, but would not sit by me.  
He pretty much demanded to sit by Josh on all rides.  

We rode Space Mountain and he was pumped to be in the front row.  

People Mover!  Favorite ride.  

I rode Astro Orbiter for the first time since I was little.  
Quinn did agree to riding with me.  


Barn Stormer.  

We squeezed in together to Splash Mountain. 

Thunder Mountain.  

Photo bomb baby.  

Mine Train.  

Small World!

Through super small crowds and good fast passes we walked on everything we wanted to ride.  We got really lucky.  

The next day we headed off to Epcot.  

We had to go visit Figment.  

Then chilled for awhile in the DVC club and made plans for Food and Wine.  

We had a splurge and ate Hibachi in Japan. 

Then off to see Nemo.  

Space Ship Earth.  

Test Track was super fun.  

We bribed Quinn into letting us try out a few Food and Wine kiosks by getting him a huge Dole Whip.  


We had such a good time.  It was an action packed trip.  It brought me home ready to get right back into the thick of things.  I love these Disney resets.  


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