::tomatoes up the wazoo::

Big fun.  BIG fun.  I choose a bunch of different varieties to plant this year.  I picked some based on size and some just on color.  I just wanted types that sounding interesting.  If I hate them, surely someone at work will eat them.  Here is a list of what types of tomatoes I planted and how big the finished fruit is.  Once they actually come up and I will review them and see if they live up to their hype. 

Fourth of July Hybrid (49days, yes I said 49, 4oz)

I’ve got two of these little babies growing like weeds in the orchard garden. The early factor is the only reason I tried them out, but if they don’t taste great they are off next years list.

Big Mama Hybrid (80 days, 8oz)

“Enormous, incredibly meaty fruit, up to 5” long and 3” across. Practically seedless, sauces lot of time peeling and coring; perfect for tasty sauces.” I am super excited for these puppies too. I plan to can the tar out of them. I planted 4 in the orchard garden.

Big Rainbow (80days, 16+oz)

“This colorful variety is bright yellow streaked with scarlet.” And it is a crazy shape. I can’t wait to try out this puppy. I have one in the cottage garden and one back in the orchard.

Black Krim (80 days, 8oz)

“Very dark maroon, tasty beefsteak that originated in Crimea. Offers incredible tangy flavor, and delightful juicy texture.” These suckers are so cool. Some may think they look rotten, but they are just so visually interesting to me. I can’t wait for them to show up. I have one in the cottage garden and one in the orchard garden.

Italian Ice (65 days, cherry)

“Sugary sweet bursting with juicy flavor.” I can’t wait on these. I think I am most excited for them. They are white and I plan to eat lots of them. But I also know that one cherry tomato plant goes a long way. So, I only planted one out in the orchard garden.

Sunny Boy Hybrid (75 days, one pound)

“With bright, luminous flavor, this yellow tomato is edible sunlight.”

Who can argue with that? How can I not grow this sucker? I planted two of these. One in the cottage garden and one in the orchard garden.

 

Orange Wellinton (75 days, 12oz)

“Bursting with flavor, here’s a tomato you’ll want to have dinner with, or lunch or the occasional snack.”

I really wanted to try an orange tomato and this one fit the bill. I have two in the ground. One in the cottage garden and one in the orchard garden.

Burpee’s Supersteak Hybrid (80 days, 32oz)

“The original giant with beefsteak taste and meaty texture.” I wanted to grow at least one that was big enough to be startling. I have two in the orchard garden.

Red October (68 days, 8oz)

“Keeps for up to 16 weeks. Hangs on the vine longer without softening, too. Great flavor and color.” 16 weeks???? That’s wonderful. That 16 weeks of BLT’s. Bring it. Two of these puppies out in the orchard garden.

Brandy Wine Pink (85 days, 14oz)

“Rich flavored, potato leaf pink heirloom, from 1885. One of the best tasting tomatoes of all time .” What a potato leaf?? I guess I am going to find out. I have two of these in my orchard garden.

Super sweet 100 Hybrid (70days, cherry)

I planted one of these little guys out in the orchard. You have to have at least one red cherry tomato plant or what kind of gardener are you?

Any favorite types I missed? Things I should consider for next year?  Which one looks/sounds best to you? 

Again - once these tomatoes come in I will measure them and taste them (lots) to see if they match their description.  Maybe I should have a tomato party?

::new job::

I have been working on this for awhile, but I didn't want put it out there on blog land till I really knew the details.  A few days ago I got my final offer from Community Hospital.  I accepted.  Even though I just about wanted to cry my eyes out when I told my manager.

I will be floating between NICU, peds, and ED!  The people in the know call it the ED, ER is the wrong term.  Which I have keep reminding myself, because I know so little about ED that I can't even call it by the right name.  I will start in NICU just to learn the system and then float to any of the hospitals, based on their need.   

Pro's

New hospital - where I don't have any negative relationships to things

New unit that is very uncomfortable for me.  

Growing and stretching always leads to solid personal discovery. 

Significantly more money  - BUT that is not the most important part to me

All I know if NICU, it will be good to not be a one trick pony

I am staying PRN in NICU, I hope - that is still in the process

      PRN = as needed, working twice a month at least

New adventure

Con's

New unit that is VERY uncomfortable for me

They only wear solid Navy scrubs - BORING

I will miss my support group.  I am so blessed with the greatest friends at work.

No benefits.  Which I don't need with Josh's job, but that also mean so paid maternity leave.  (IN THE FUTURE!)

Requires a degree of flexibility that may be uncomfortable at time, but I will go in expecting that

Thoughts???

::tea's over, now what::

Well the tea party happened.
My big distraction is over.
So, now what?

Don't you worry.
The lists are being refined.

Here's my current edition

1. Turn focus to the triplets birthday party.  Which is going to rock the house.

2.  Clean the playroom.  Not just a quick company-is-coming-over-shove-it-all-in-baskets clean.  I slow all day clean every basket and nook and cranny.  Put about 1/2 the toys away in the attic to rotate through.  There is just too much crap in there right now and it is visually overwhelming.  To kids and me.  DONE


3.  Keep eyes open for KILLER idea's for Lily's science party in September and my friend Becky's baby shower in October.

4.  Get ready for a summer of photo shoots.  GULP.  I have 2 different sets of quads to shoot plus 8!!! other families set up, and TWO different senior pictures to do.  Scheduled and ready to party.  That's a lot for me, and I am nervous about it.  But I am always nervous about it.

5.  PURGES!!!  The attic needs a full empty and redo before it gets to hot to go up there.
      I want a holiday area, long term storage area, kids clothes area, luggage area, toy rotation area, and ???

6.  All closets in the entire house need a remodel and need their purpose maximized. 

7.  ANIMALS!!  Time to start training the new babies to walk on leashes for fair.  The pony also needs some major loving because he is bored to death.  I need to clean out the chicken coop.  I need to clean out the old goat pen so that the dogs can use it better.

T2D in my notebook:  (PS-thanks for the post it love note Blythe.  Loved it)
Triplets birthday
Dogs to the vet - one at a time and to low cost place
Luna needs puppy class (humane society???)
Get back on the alphabet wall
Paint my Dad's shelves he made
Fix up goodwill kids cabinet
Fall in love with pinterest
Set up Lily summer curiculum

::tea party budget::

I am cheap.  Super cheap.  I have not bought Max a new item of clothing in over a year.  Everything he owns comes from the used clothing store or goodwill.

I also read all the party blogs I can find.  LOVE THEM!!  All the creativity makes me so happy.  (If you have a recommendation on one let me know)

But my cheapness and my desire to hold insane kids parties does not go hand in hand all the time.  I wanted about $500 to spend on the tea party.  But I knew that was crazy.  $250 was crazy too, but I needed a little splurge.  Just a little.  I do so much to save us money, can’t I just have this little luxury??????  That’s how I justified it to myself.  Josh seemed to buy it to, because he wasn’t on me too bad.

Here is what the party budget broke down to be.

Costs:
            Crafts:
                        Teacup crafts $6 (I had the sharpies)
                        Paper hats $0
                        Paper Trees $0 (I had it all)
                        Paper dolls $8
            Decor:
                        Table skirt $20 in fabric, but I hope to reuse it
                        Pink cups $10 – and I will reuse them
                        Breakables from goodwill - $25
                                    I can reuse the tea pots but I gave away the tea cups/saucers
                        Colorful pots - $30
                                    Perfect for the front porch
                        Butterflies/flowers - $30
                                    Splurge
                        Pink flat sheet - $5
                        Napkins, utensils, etc - $5
                        The rest was made from things I already had
                        Treat bags - $8
                        Envelopes - $5
                        Misc - $20
            Food:
                        See food post for details $65

TOTAL:  under $240

Why waste the money on a party that isn’t even a birthday party (ie – the tea party)?  Because I needed a distraction.  Because I just wanted to focus on doing something fun for Lily and her little friends.  Because I had to cancel Max’s birthday party and I was party jonesing.  Because Because Because.  Because I did.  But after it was over, Josh and I had a big talk about what me going into party over drive does to the family.  It turns me into a bossy drill sergeant.  If everyone isn’t doing exactly what I want them to do, I go insane.  It’s a touchy environment.  He didn’t bring up the expense, but that is part of it too.  So, I have decided that this is my last random party for awhile.  Not forever.  I really want to have a Halloween party someday.  But in the next year it’s just birthday parties.  (And the GREATEST baby shower ever coming up in October for my great friend at work)

Lily’s September Party – Science
October baby shower – theme ???  AWESOMENESS
Max January Party – Dinosaur?  Red wagon? Trucks? Who knows?

::baby Ellie::

Want to see more of baby Ellie?

Link here.

::stupid cat digging::

 

 I hate the barn cats.

Mostly.

They dig in my garden.

They think it is a big litter box.

All the darker areas are places they have been at.

Poor zinnia's are never going to grow.

 

So I took the wire cutters and cut out a piece of fence from an old roll we have laying around.

 

I put that piece of fence over the flower beds at the front of the cottage garden.

Now the flowers can grow up and through the fence but the cats can't dig.

 

 I used the sticks to hold it in place. 

So far so good.

Now bring on some perfect zinnia's.

  

::now days::

At least a few times a day I can here the clock ticking off in the back on my head reminding me that my not going to happen due date is coming up.  I walk around feeling 95% and then something happens that kills it.  I just really want to get past June.  I am like a caged lion most of the time.  I run all day every day at full force so that I can keep my mind distracted.  I plant huge gardens, and do photo shoots, and make 600 lists so that I can fall in to bed and sleep like a log. 

Story one:

There is a mom in the unit right now that is particularly broken.  I see it in her face.  It's like a reflection of me in January.  Dead behind the eyes.  I couldn't take it.  I was literally having a physical reaction to her.  I felt like I was going to throw up every time I had to be near her.  After a few shifts of this, in which I asked not to have that baby anymore, but by a twist of fate kept getting her back, I sat down and looked at that Momma and told her she needed help.  Every time she walked through the door she would just cry and cry and cry, tears literally rolling down the isolette.  I told her that she was broken and that her baby needed her.  And even though the trauma she went through in the OR was unbearable (meaning the trauma of the delivery) she had to get better.  I told her she had a long road in front of her and that her baby needed her, and that she needed professional help.  I explained to her how frustrating the NICU is.  I told her she had PTSD and that she needed help.  That this wasn't just post parduem blues.  I explained to her that she had no peers in this, so to use us nurses as much as she needed us.  She talked to me about her unfairly empty belly and her fear to leave the unit.  I saw her yesterday and she looked so much better.  Started down the road to getting better.  So, why can I feel a disproportionate amount of sadness for this Mom but if you asked me if I was sad about Zack I would say no?  When I was TL yesterday the power went out on the unit for 2 seconds.  I jumped out of my chair and ran directly to this Momma's baby to make sure its vent was working correctly still.  I try to be too cool for school, but in that moment of possible emergency this baby was the first thought I had. And also - I have this strong gut feeling that her baby is going to make it.  She's tough (the baby), but my radar is so off that I can't trust it.  

Story two:
One of my bestest friends had her precious baby girl.  This friend has been through so much.  She lost her first husband suddenly to cancer and has since married the second most amazing man alive (Josh gets front runner).  They had their first baby last week.  I am in love with her.  Why does that baby not sting?  Not at all.  I feel so normal and happy about her.  I feel so REJOICEFUL for my friend.  Nothing but rejoiceful.  No hidden jealousy or sadness.  Why?  Why?  Because I want to bottle that and feel it for all.  

Story Three:

My good friend, who has had some scary complications, had her baby last night while I was at work.  I stood at the OR door and just listened for his cry.  I didn't want to intrude on this personal family event, but I had to hear him cry.  I told the delivery team I was there as a second nurse if things got hairy.  But I prayed like crazy they would not.  And when I heard him cry I felt such amazing relief for my friend.  And then I went in the stair well and cried my eyes out.  Because we had very similar due dates (her man came just a tick early) and we were both having boys and I've walked by the room I delivered Zack in every time I would go to see her.  Sometimes I even touch the door, just to tell that room its not the boss of me.  I gave myself 15 seconds of crying.  Just 15, because I am not going to mourn life.  I am going to celebrate my friends new baby.  Then I watched my Max videos on my phone to recover my mood and went up stairs to finish the day.  Which I did.
(Laura - don't feel bad.  I am SO happy for you, but this is just a step in my grief process.  I love you.)

Last point~

But, at what point is it ok for me to turn and run from NICU?  I think that point is now.  I have been back since February, but I still feel wrong there.  I don't have enough emotional stockpile to have any to share.  I am lots better.  95% most of the time.  But my shifts in NICU take it out of me.