::donkey is the best pet::

If I had to sell every single animal we own - even the dogs I would BEG to keep my Donkey.  

I had a pretty little broodmare back in the day that I kept at a brood farm.  That place had a set of two mini donkeys.  They were so cute.  Sweet - funny - easy.  HILARIOUS.  I wanted one.  I sold the idea easily to my Dad and he bought me one as a wedding present.  Josh was so annoyed.  What a stupid useless creature to own.  Exactly.  

My Mother, Emma and I drove to this big mini donkey farm.  They hooked Donkey to a cart and I drove him around.  I loved his three year old little self.  The farm claimed fame with a champion donk that held the high jump record.  Link here to go to the website.  Emma signed his registration papers (which I have lost - like I would ever sell him).  We loaded him up and took him to Dad's office and walked him all around the yard.

We played with him, but he wasn't kid broke.  After two years or so the neighbor farm boys decided they wanted to ride him one day.  He bucked them off.  They thought it was so funny that they spent some time chasing him around and doing it over and over.  And they broke him.  Like a mustang getting broke.  Ride him till he stops bucking.  And he did.  He has never bucked since.  I have seen my little toddlers waddle up to him.  Grab his fur, pull and pull, get lifted onto him, sit for as long as they want, pull his fur some more, and get lifted down.  He is frozen like a statue.  When the kids are outside he comes to the fence and waits for them to come pet him.  I think he learned that they bring the most treats, then he just kind of found himself in love with them.  

Donkey got his feet done the other day.  I kept trying to get the farrier to agree with me that he was the best Donkey ever.  He finally said that all his clients that have Donks try to get him to say the same thing.  I responded, "Yes, but mine is actually the best one."

Of course having a mini donkey gives me many chances to make terrible puns.  Such as:
Stop looking at my assI have a cute little hairy ass
What a dirty ass
Every body is always riding my ass
Don't touch my ass
etc - etc - etc